Thursday, October 11, 2012

Trust Issues



I had a conversation the other day with a young man whose girlfriend had dumped him after 18 months. He was understandably saddened and distraught over this development. He told me the story through his tears and sobs and at one point concluded, “I don’t know what I am going to do. I’ll never meet anyone I care about as much as her.”
 
There was a response I wanted to give, and there was an appropriate response. The appropriate response was to listen, empathize and care for him without offering any advice that I thought would “fix” his problem. He wasn’t looking for a fix at the time, just caring.

He also wasn’t looking, at the moment, for any philosophical advice that I could have offered based on my advanced age and experience. But that was the response I wanted to give. In 35 years of ministry I have heard this story, or a version of it, many times. My prediction would be that he would be sad and distraught for a period of time, but before long he would be introducing me to the new “love of his life.” His sadness would dissipate and would be replaced with joy and a sense that he was very glad he didn’t stay with his former girlfriend.

We all have “trust issues.” We profess faith in God’s goodness and His desire to give us good things. We profess that we look to God to direct and guide our lives and to take care of us when things get difficult. We trust God to be involved in our lives and to reveal his plan for us. However, too often God’s plan looks a lot like the plan we have for our lives; and when things don’t go according to our plan, we are disappointed, discouraged, saddened and distraught. We wonder why God failed us, or how we failed.

Well, we can’t have it both ways. We can’t say that God has a plan for our lives and that we trust him, and then wonder what happened when things don’t go the way we thought had been planned.

Now, I am not saying that we are not going to feel disappointed, or sad, or even distraught when plans fail. I am saddened and distraught periodically. That is only natural and normal. However, I keep this question of the Apostle Paul nearby:

“Who has known the mind of the Lord, or who has been his counselor?”

No one has understood God, and no one has ever helped him out with advice.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,
declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

Oftentimes the journey to embracing God’s plan is filled with sadness, disappointment and pain. Isn’t that the story of Jesus’ last week of life? Suffering, pain, and difficulty, all of which He expressed very openly, on His way to embracing God’s plan of our salvation through the cross and the power of Hope which comes through the resurrection.

It is difficult to trust God in the midst of difficulty and pain, but at the same time we know we can trust Him for our future regardless of the present.

“How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?”
But I will trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.” (Psalm 13:1,5)

We’re all working through our “trust issues.”

 


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